Wholly Loved Sponsor Interview

Interview With Sponsor Kathy Collard Miller

Kathy Collard Miller's headshotWe love freedom stories, and man, does our sponsor Kathy Collard Miller have a powerful story to share. We know God and does transform lives, but sometimes it can be easy to forget this. Sometimes when I look at our world, honestly, I see so much darkness. So much hurt. It may appear as if the darkness is winning. But then, through stories like Kathy shares below, I’m reminded that God is actively filling our world with life and light.

But first, fun news! Right now for a limited time, the Kindle version of God’s Intriguing Questions: 40 Old Testament Devotions Revealing God’s Nature is available for 99 cents. Check it out HERE It’s perfect for an individual or couple devotional time.

How long have you been writing?

A long time! LOL. My first article was published in Moody Monthly Magazine in 1978. I wrote about how God delivered me from being an abusive mom. I requested they publish it anonymously, which they did, because I was still so ashamed of what I’d done.

But that initial confirmation of the importance of my story encouraged me to share. And when an invitation came to speak at the mom’s group for our church, God gave me the courage to say yes! With great fear, I shared my story with the 120 women who were there and their response let me know this was something important giving God glory.

Then I went to a writer’s conference in 1980 and four years later, my story was published as a memoir book. Today that book has been updated and it’s titled, No More Anger: Hope for an Out-of-Control Mom.

Of course everyone wants to know about your family now. Give us an update.

I love to tell of God’s healing work. One of the problems contributing to my anger was the unrealistic expectations I had that my husband, Larry, should meet all my needs. God changed my perspective and this year (2020), we’ll celebrate our 50th anniversary. We are more in love than I could have ever thought possible. And Larry actually wants to meet my needs as much as possible even if we both know only Jesus can do that.

As for my daughter who I abused when she was a toddler, we have a very close relationship and she supports my ministry and has aspirations of being a novelist! She is a loving wife of 20 years, mom of two (my grandkids!!!!), and ministry leader at her church. Amazing what God can do!

What would you say to someone who is currently struggling with anger?

God knows exactly His plan for your healing, and it will be a process. He loves to work through our Holy-Spirit-supplied strength because then we learn what we can share with others later. No matter what your struggle is, God is working more than you realize. There will be starts and delays and backups, but God is progressively working. He’d working not just for your benefit but because it gives Him glory.

I love 1 Timothy 4:15: “Practice these things, immerse yourself in them, so that all may see your progress.” The word “progress” is the idea of a pioneer cutting his way through the brushwood (Vine’s Dictionary). Little by little by little. We would prefer to have God’s instantaneous deliverance but then we would no longer need God’s help.

As we study parenting books, attend parenting classes, study God’s Word about parenting, and share vulnerably and ask for prayer, God will do a work deep in our hearts, not just make everything better. I also recommend getting counseling and spiritual support. I found all those avenues helped me.

What is the main message you believe God has given you and why?

At different times in my ministry of over 40 years, God has made different things especially important to me. Right now, I’m most passionate about Christians knowing God’s attributes in truth. As I’ve grown spiritually over the years, the Holy Spirit has spotlighted different lies I believed about who God is. I might say, “I know He’s trustworthy” but I still worried. Or “I know He’s leading those I care about,” but I still need to tell them what to do. We can subtly respond in ways that reveal our deeper beliefs and heart commitments. We’re acting out lies about who God is and may not realize it.

 

That’s why my two most recent books are devotionals which explore how God reveals Himself –His true nature–in the Bible. Kathy's book cover imagesInterestingly it’s through the questions He asks. In the Bible, God/Jesus asks more than 300 questions. Isn’t that fascinating? He doesn’t need information but He still asks people questions to help them examine their beliefs about Him and their own motives. Just think, why did God ask Adam and Eve, “Where are you?” and why did Jesus ask the sick man, “Do you want to be healed?” Both questions offer opportunities to delve into the longings and motives of the person He is addressing. God and Jesus are the expert question-askers with a purpose!

My husband, Larry, and I wrote these two books which are:

“God’s Intriguing Questions: 40 Old Testament Devotions Revealing God’s Nature”

“God’s Intriguing Questions: 60 Old Testament Devotions Revealing Jesus’s Nature”

Kathy, what is your favorite attribute of God?

For me, it’s His sovereignty. He is totally in control and in charge of everything that happens even as He doesn’t take away human choice. How that all works, I don’t know exactly. But I do know how much peace, confidence, and desire to obey God comes from my growth in knowing God is sovereign.

Find her author page HERE.

Visit her on YouTube HERE.

Do you have a freedom story to share? We’d love to hear it! Find out how to participate in our freedom challenge HERE. See what you could win HERE.

Also, make sure to visit us on Crosswalk to receive daily devotions sent directly to your inbox. You can find our devotions HERE.

Wholly Loved Ministries is a non-profit organization that exists to help women live in Christ’s freedom. Donate now to support our mission or contact us to learn more.

Wholly Loved Sponsor Interview

Interview With Our Sponsor Kathy Collard Miller

Freedom quote pulled from Kathy Collard Miller's Interview

Today we’re thrilled to introduce one of our generous sponsors, Kathy Collard Miller. She’s an author and speaker who loved Jesus and seeing others experience the heart-change that only God can bring about. Read her interview below to learn how God helped her move from intense and hurtful anger to love and peace. God truly does transform!

Hi, Kathy, thank you so much for your generous support of Wholly Loved Ministries and our next project, Anchored and Secure! Thank you also for your honesty and transparency! We know when we boldly share our freedom stories, God uses them to bring others freedom! So thank you. Click To Tweet

If someone met you and wanted to know quickly your life’s peaks, what would you tell them?

Hi! I’m Kathy! I have lived for over 7 decades and the highlights are becoming a Christian at 18, getting married to Larry at 20 (on the brink of 21), having two children, being led by God to write and speak, and then becoming a grandmother. Being a grandmother is fabulous, by the way.

And what are the valleys of your life?

Yes, there are both the highlights and peaks for every life, aren’t there? So, my valleys are being disappointed by my husband, displacing my anger onto our toddler daughter to the point I physically abused her, and almost committing suicide because I believed God had given up on me.

Well, that answer begs an explanation. What happened?

Through a year-long process of change, God empowered me to forgive my husband for being imperfect and ask for God’s forgiveness because I tried to control my husband instead of trusting God. I also saw God’s answers for learning to… Click To Tweet

And today?

Larry and I will celebrate our 50th anniversary in June, 2020, and our daughter loves me! That good report of God’s grace continues to amaze me. Plus, God urged me to fulfill a deep desire to write and out of that He began a ministry that has been going on for over 35 years.

When did you first recognize your deep desire to write?

I loved being at my roll top desk in my bedroom from early on. And I even tried to write a novel in middle school. The title of my novel was “That Boy Rick.” Yes, it was a romance novel written by a teen. That’s sorta funny, don’t you think? I only wrote two chapters I think. I wish I could find those hand-written papers.

What was your first article and book?

My first article told the story of how God delivered me from being a child abuser and healed our marriage. My story was also my first book which is currently revised and titled No More Anger: Hope for an Out of Control Mom.

Tell us about your many books and which one is your favorite?

I love that question because I’m a little snarky when I reply, “And pray tell, which of your children is your favorite?” LOL But I understand the question and even though it’s very hard to pick one, it’s usually my latest. And in this case, that book is co-written with my husband and titled God’s Intriguing Questions: 40 Old Testament Devotions Revealing God’s Nature. For quite awhile I began paying attention to how many questions God asks in the Bible, beginning within the first three chapters of the whole Bible—when God asked Adam and Eve: “Where are you?” And they extend through the New Testament with Jesus being the perfect question asker. This is indeed intriguing because God isn’t looking for information. He knows everything.

As Larry and I talked about what we learned, we realized in the dialogue between God and the person He was addressing, God was revealing Himself to that person and helping him or her to see the lies they believed about Him. What we learned became our book along with new background information we gleaned from our research. We really wanted to bring attention to insights a reader might not have noticed before. Also, to apply what they learned, so we end each devotion with two discussion questions and a short prayer.

Well, of course, we have to ask since the subtitle says, 40 Old Testament Devotions Revealing God’s Nature, will there be a book on New Testament questions?

Absolutely. And that book will contain 60 devotions based on the questions Jesus asked. After all, why would He ask the man by the pool, “Do you want to be healed?” Duh! Who wouldn’t? But since Jesus asked that particular person and never asked anyone else that question (that we know of) Jesus knew exactly what that particular man needed to hear. That’s another thing we learned about the questions God and Jesus (who is God the Son, of course), asked. Each question uniquely inquired into the heart’s motives of the person or group of people He addressed. Fascinating and intriguing. Click To Tweet

As we close, tell us a bird’s eye view of your other books.

I’m privilege at this writing to say God has given me the privilege of having over 55 books published in non-fiction genres of Christian Living topics, women’s Bible studies, and Bible commentaries. I’ve addressed topics like marriage, parenting, contentment, perfectionism, anger, motives, godliness, women of the Bible and many others. I’m so grateful God would fulfill the deep desire for writing that He awakened within me early in my life. And like whipped topping on strawberries, He also gave me the joy of speaking for women’s groups in over 35 US states and 9 foreign countries. Plus, Larry and I often speak together at marriage seminars and retreats.

To reach Kathy, go to KathyCollardMillard.com, Find her author page on Facebook and Amazon, and follow her on Twitter and Pinterest.

Cover image for God's Intriguing QuestionsCheck out her book, God’s Intriguing Questions: 40 Old Testament Devotions Revealing God’s Nature:

Has God ever asked you a question? Have you learned something about who He is and your own motives? Or maybe you’ve wondered why God asks questions at all. Have you noticed the many times God and Jesus ask questions in the Bible? Doesn’t it seem rather unusual? After all, God knows everything. To His glory, God Almighty doesn’t lack information, discernment, or understanding.

Therefore, why does He ask questions? Does He need to ask questions? For whose benefit does He ask questions? In God’s Intriguing Questions: 40 Old Testament Devotions, husband and wife team, Larry and Kathy Collard Miller share insights from examining 40 questions God asks in the Old Testament.

Their goal is to help you unearth a fascinating spiritual exploration of who God is, in all the amazing aspects of His nature—His love, grace, faithfulness, mercy, kindness, wisdom, and so many other incredible pure qualities. He desires to draw us into more intimate connection with Him by learning the truth about Him. Then we will seek Him more, trust Him more, and obey Him more often.

Buy it HERE.

Get to know Kathy:

Kathy Miller's headshotKathy Collard Miller tells her story of overcoming being an angry mom and discontented wife in her book No More Anger: Hope for An Out-of-Control Mom (Elk Lake Publishing, Inc.) She is also a speaker who has spoken in 8 foreign countries and over 30 US States. www.KathyCollardMiller.com.

Relationships

How to Handle Disagreements in a Godly Manner — Guest Post, Kimi Miller

Picture of two women laughing and quote on conflict.Though most of us would likely wish to avoid this, we all experience conflict. When handled in a Christ-like manner, with equal parts love, truth, and grace, however, what initially feels like a fail can actually become a win. Our most difficult interactions and conversations can lead to growth, healing, and life-change. Click To Tweet

When It Doesn’t Feel Like Winning
By Kimi Miller

My anger was blazing, and I didn’t care who saw or heard. What mattered most was making sure the other person knew they were wrong and I was right. I’d rehearsed my response more than a dozen times–a few times in my head, and then alone out loud in my car just to be safe. No room for emotions; I intended to spew forth my words in a predetermined manuscript without a second thought. If I wanted to “win” the argument, I needed to be prepared.

That’s when I saw someone in the car next to me looking at me like I was crazy.

In that moment, I felt I might be.

As I sat there, trying to regain control, I felt more out of control than ever.

The move I was contemplating was straight out of Satan’s playbook:

Focus on self-defense.  Pick up the offense and tuck it under my arm and run straight at the other person–full force, and let them have it. All my anger, all my frustration, all my disappointment–don’t hold back! I was right, they were wrong, and all that matters is that they know it–that they feel it. Who cares how my words were communicated–in fact, the more I talked and the less I listened all the better. Winning was what matters.

But somehow, as I sat there in the intersection practicing yelling at the invisible offender in my car–with the guy next to me likely contemplating calling the cops-it didn’t feel like winning.

As much as I wanted the other person to experience every hurt they’d caused me, that choice no longer felt right. Each time I ran through my premeditated narrative, a warm, sick feeling arose in my gut. A physical reaction I’ve come to recognize as the Holy Spirit prompting me to stop and seek His wise counsel before I sin.

When I want to win by proving I’m right, I know something is out of alignment. Click To Tweet Because the truth is, I’m not right, and neither are you. When we seek our vengeance over God’s peace, no matter how convincing our argument might appear, if Christ isn’t in it, we lose.

This is why we must learn to retrain our thoughts. The world urges us to look out for self first. Contrarily,women holding hands and walking with paraphrased text of 1 Cor. 16:13-14 God’s Word challenges us to, “Do everything in love,” (1 Corinthians 16:13-14, NIV).

But how do you do that in the heat of an argument? How is it possible, as James writes, “to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry?” (James 1:5, NIV).

To invite love into our ugliest moments, we must make space for God. Click To Tweet

Step away from the conflict. Sometimes putting physical space between you and the offender is necessary to finding clarity and direction. Remember, it’s okay to be angry, but in our anger we must not sin. Sometimes distance prevents us from saying or doing things we cannot take back. Choose to step away from the argument by stepping into communion with God.

Once alone with Him, share your hurts and offenses with God. Express your thoughts to Him through prayer and/or journaling. Get it all out with God, putting everything on the table – casting your anxiety on Him because He cares for you, (1 Peter 5:7).

Next, trust God’s way over yours.

Set aside what you think is best and ask God for His best. What is He revealing to you about the condition of the hearts involved? Is there something the other person might be wrestling with that is influencing their behavior? What is it He wants to teach you through this struggle? Is there something missing in your own self-value or worth that’s driving a need to be right? To be heard? Why is “winning” so important?  And why does this hurt so much?

When you’ve surrendered your hardest hurts to God and experience His peace–when you no longer feel that warm sick feeling in your gut–ask the Lord to show you what to do next. Click To Tweet Do you need to forgive? Do you need to apologize? Are there still words to be spoken, or points to be understood? Take as much time as you need to work through these matters of the heart but resolve to move forward. Take your queue from His playbook: Respond in love.

I’m relieved to say I never had the opportunity to voice all the ugly things I’d wanted to throw at my offender. It wasn’t because I didn’t see them again, but because I’d talked it over with God and I no longer felt the need to say anything. I forgave them and release everything else to Jesus. God helped me choose peace over tension, joy over grief, and love over validation.

Following God felt like winning.

Let’s talk about this! What steps can you take today to seek God’s perspective and wisdom for a conflict you’ve experienced or are experiencing?

Inviting God into our arguments takes practice. What are some things you can do to help develop this discipline?

If today’s post encouraged you, make sure to grab a copy of Drawing Near: 90-Day Devotional:

Cover image for Bible study devotionalEach day, God beckons us to Himself, calling us to rest in His love and grace. As we do, He heals our hurts, overpowers our fears with love, and restores us to the women He created us to be. This 90-day devotional, written by women who are learning themselves to live anchored in God’s grace, will help you deepen your faith and grow your relationship with Christ.

Buy it HERE.

We also encourage you to grab a free copy of our Bible study, based on the life of Sara. You can find it HERE. You can watch the first week’s video HERE.

Get to know Kimi!

Kimi Miller lives in Papillion, Nebraska, with her husband and two teenage sons. She stays busy taking care of their home, their two high-strung cattle dogs, and working part-time as a secretary at the local police department. She is a United States Air Force veteran and former pastor of women’s ministry. She holds a Bachelor’s degree in Organizational Communication and a Master’s degree in Christian Ministry with a concentration in theology. One of her many God-sized dreams is to organize a free city-wide women’s ministry event that spreads the love and hope only found in Jesus. Her laughter is contagious, as is her passion for the Word of God. You can read more about Kimi at her blog www.kimimiller.com.

Make sure to connect with Wholly Loved Ministries on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. You can also join our closed online community by clicking through the button below.

Wholly Loved Ministries
Private group · 467 members
 

Join Group

 

A place for women to come together, share their struggles, celebrations, and insights, and inspire one another to be all God created them to be.